Forgiving is not just about doing good to others, it is also about setting ourselves free from the very strong and very unhealthy bond that resentment creates.
It is easier to visualize this in a specific context from real life: You know “Anna”, that friend of yours that you don’t forgive for something she’s done that hurt you? By not forgiving Anna, you actually empower her to hold you hostage to that hurt for much, much longer.
It is so much healthier to forgive Anna: you don’t even need to tell her you’ve forgiven her or bring her back into your life.
Forgiveness is all about conscious actions and quickly becomes a very constructive attitude towards life. Once you’ve forgiven Anna, you will feel progressively more peaceful and empowered to manage your relationships better.
Forgiving her makes your life easier because you won’t have to deal with those negative emotions that might otherwise make you bitter. We all know how negativity works.
Another very important thing: forgiveness is not just for people that you think are ‘good’ or ‘deserving’ of forgiveness. It is for everyone, or else it embeds judgment and becomes tyrannical. But I’ll explore this very interesting topic further in my next posting.