Categories
love

We can love everyone, but liking is a different story

There is no doubt that we love in imperfect ways, given that we are imperfect. Yet I have found that the deeper I connect with God, the more love I seem to have to give. And the more I open myself to loving everyone, the easier and the more powerful my love becomes. I am at a point where I genuinely feel love for everyone. This means I forgive everyone and accept the fact that we are all on the same boat: imperfect, full of flaws – in other words (Biblical words), we’re all ‘sinful’.

Liking, though, is a whole different story. Liking requires a character ‘match’. A sense of mutual agreement, identification, a strong sharing of values or at the very least getting along – peacefully.

There are people I love, but I absolutely will not seek their company.

There are people for whom I pray and I wish them well, but their company doesn’t do me good – so I avoid it.

There are people that I have forgiven and love, but that doesn’t mean I have to bring them back into my life.

There are very clear examples of relationships that simply don’t work out for a lack of compatibility. There’s no good reason to let people (back) into our lives to establish connections that are not edifying. It is very important for us to be aware of what, or who, edifies us:

“All things are lawful, but not all things are profitable. All things are lawful, but not all things edify.” – Corinthians 10:23

Categories
faith love spirituality

Reconnection

I spent 33 years hoping to find, and often seeking, a profoundly unique connection with others. There were even a few moments when I was convinced that I had found it. In such moments, I longed to be known to a depth that would exhaust every single facet of my character. I desired to know the other person just as deeply. I wanted sameness and synchronicity. But ultimately what I really, really wanted was to be loved unconditionally. However, once the masks fell, it proved a real challenge to negotiate differences and I was left in a state of confusion: Why did all these connections began so dazzling, so powerful… almost divine! And yet they all turned out as repetitive, mundane representations of every other type of connection that’s out there?

I never thought I would find a satisfying explanation for this puzzle that’s haunted every connection I’ve had with people along the way. But I did. And it’s changed everything.

I believe that what I was seeking was not merely a connection, but a reconnection. With God, not with a person. Not from this life, but from even before I was born. And I kept identifying it exactly where it should be in its primal stage: the very beginning of a love interest or inspiring friendship. That’s when there are still no “irreconcilable” differences getting in the way of love, or better yet – that’s when we’re all playing “perfect”. We’re all “good” under such a light, the light of freshness, hope and promise.

Knowing that has helped me accept one truth: I am not going to genuinely find and sustain this reconnection through being with someone else. I simply cannot attain it. God is the one who loves me just as I always wanted to be loved and knows me exactly as I have always wanted to be known. This reconnection is already in me and comes from God. The realization of such a fundamental truth freed me.

Who’s the love of my life? God. No one else could fill such infinite shoes.

Categories
love

Good

From the moment you decide to become an essentially good person, you quickly realize how easy that is in theory, and how unpredictable the results are in practice. But the mere exercise of trying is worth it. Knowing that you are walking somewhat of a straight path that leads to growth.